Middlesbrough 2-0 Liverpool – The Curious Beast That Is Football

So does Liverpool’s 2-0 defeat at the Riverside mean that Middlesbrough are better than Real Madrid? Or perhaps it affirms Gareth Southgate as a tactically superior coach to Juande Ramos?

Then again, the Real Madrid manager’s record in the Premiership is not too dissimilar to Southgate’s, so maybe this is not so overly far-fetched a theory as it seems. Wait, does that mean Southgate could manage at the Bernabeu? No, he should be sacked; with him in charge Boro are teetering dangerously around the relegation zone in England. Just like Tottenham were with Ramos in charge, before he left. For Real Madrid. Help!

Ok, so I’m being slightly playful here. But, seriously, does the Reds’ 2-0 loss on Teeside, just days after a superb, tactically flawless win in one of the game’s most intimidating cauldrons not embody perfectly football’s endless complexities, it’s mosaic of contradictions?

That Liverpool can go to the home of the Spanish champions without their talismanic leader Steven Gerrard and utterly smother the cocky posturing of the self-styled biggest club in the world is a testament to the organisation, patience and concentration of Rafa Benitez’s compact, hard-working team.

That they can then travel to Middlesbrough with their fit-again, inspirational captain and lose comfortably to a relegation-threatened, mediocre side without a goal at home in the league for almost two months, whose fans have farcically been told to keep the noise down by their own establishment, is a mystery to the inventor of the Rubik’s Cube himself, who if put to him would probably ponder it quietly, an air of puzzled resignation etched onto his face, before giving up and shuffling off sheepishly for a round of Guitar Hero. Looking at the two results logically defies belief.

Defying belief however, is a market Benitez has cornered quite well. The moment you think Benitez is clueless, he defies it by pulling off a result of majesty, like the one achieved in Madrid. The moment he is hailed a genius, he masterminds toothless surrender to a team going nowhere. In the ongoing Anfield power struggle, just when he was cornered by the firing squad, the Spaniard’s demise at Liverpool looking practically assured with the ominous suspension of betting by the bookmakers, he squeezes out through a narrow trapdoor and eliminates Rick Parry. Rafa Benitez is Keyzer Soze.

Naturally one can look at Liverpool’s 2-0 defeat to Middlesbrough and draw their own, perfectly logical conclusions as to why the Reds could not cut it. Boro showed more commitment on the day. Liverpool’s European exertions left them jaded. Benitez’s team selection and tactics were as flawed here as they were inspired in Madrid (man of the moment Yossi Benayoun on the bench, Martin Skrtel at right back). The Reds, without Fernando Torres, were too wasteful in front of goal. Stewart Downing was on good form. The Champions League format more suits Rafa’s approach.

But really, can any one of those factors truly justify the chasmic disparity between Liverpool here and Liverpool against Real Madrid?

This strange football alchemy applies to Middlesbrough too. Boro have a habit of mixing stellar performances against the big boys with shoddy ones against lesser luminaries. Last season at the Riverside they took points off Arsenal, United and Liverpool at home, but lost seven other league games including a hapless 2-0 defeat to Cardiff City. Hopeless and without a win in fourteen league games this year, Gareth Southgate’s side then turn up against one of the best sides in Europe (judging by Liverpool’s Champions Leage record over recent seasons) and make them look completely ordinary.

Or, wait, reverse that. Maybe Liverpool are actually an ordinary team, only capable of turning up in Europe? Oh no, its all getting hazy again. What is not hazy though, what does remain clear as crystal is that now, as always, football’s endlessly mystifying complexities only further contribute to the game’s enduring allure.

English Premier League, Liverpool, Middlesbrough, Rafael Benitez